Thursday thoughts from Mitch Hedberg,

 

Good afternoon everyone. here are some funny quotes for you.

"I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that."

-Mitch Hedberg.

"I don't have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who'd be mad at me for saying that."

-Mitch Hedberg.

"My report card always said, 'Jim finishes first and then disrupts the other students.'"~Jim Carrey

"Well, I'm not really ready for a relationship, Lois, but thank you for asking. Hey, maybe I'll give you a call sometime. Your number's still 911? All righty then."-Jim Carrey, 'Ace Ventura'.

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Monday thoughts-Humor from famous people

 

Good morning everyone. Happy Monday. Here are some quotes from famous people. I hope they bring you smiles.

Thomas Sowell

"It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance."

Oscar Wilde

"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."

"Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops."~Cary Grant

Mark Twain

"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."

Jim Carrey

"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes."

Henny Youngman

"If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late."

Josh Billings

"Every man has his follies—and often they are the most interesting thing he has got."